Wreck It.

Thank goodness it’s Monday!

What!? I know, I rarely ever say that about Monday.

You will probably never say that about Monday either.

Let me tell you about last week.

It was freaking amazing.

Until Wednesday… at about 3:15 p.m.

I was on my way home from work and had just come to a standstill on the overpass because there was a stalled car somewhere on the freeway.

This is normal for Houston traffic.

Person on the side of the road…traffic, paper flying across the freeway…traffic, bright metallic green escalade with 24-inched rims…traffic.

You get the point.

Anyway, at that very moment, for some reason, I looked up in my rear view mirror only to see that a car was coming at me around 50-55 m.p.h.

In that very moment, I knew I was powerless, I shut my eyes and waited for the impact.

He hit me, and hard.

I pulled onto the shoulder, got out of the car in tears from the impact, and immediately called my dad, then 911.

Wrecks are no fun.

Especially when you get hit by an 18-year old boy who speaks very little English.

Or at least he pretended to speak very little English.

He was texting and driving…duh.

Oh, and not to mention…my car is totaled.

But I count my blessings…it could have been worse.

Then, there are days where I have epiphanies and think…did I really just create that?

Yesterday was one of those days.

IMG_0399Let’s pulverize some cashews while we blow off some car wreck steam.

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Then, that stuff up there…ya that…homemade coconut butter.

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Let’s blend those two together.

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What you get is a giant bowl of smooth, creamy, nutty, coconut, cashew heaven butter.

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Then we get extreme by adding: chopped cashew pieces AND toasted coconut.

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Mhhhhmmm…we like to do awesomely insane things around here.

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I mean, I’m not really sure how I did this.

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What car wreck?

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I’m on a crunchy tidal wave of coconut and cashew epic-ness.

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This is fully legal.

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It’s also fully loaded.

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Your Monday just can’t get any better.

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Oh, yes.

😉

Crunchy Toasted Coconut Cashew Butter
Author: 
Recipe type: Snack, Nut Butter
Cuisine: American
Prep time: 
Cook time: 
Total time: 
Serves: 10-12
 
Creamy, slightly sweet coconut butter + nutty cashew butter come together w/ crisp toasted coconut and chopped cashews for the perfect crunch! Gluten-free, paleo, vegan.
Ingredients
  • 3 c. unsweetened, flaked coconut
  • 2 c. dry-roasted, unsalted cashews, plus 1c. roughly chopped cashews, for add-in
Instructions
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
  2. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
  3. Spread 1 c. of the coconut out evenly over the baking sheet.
  4. Bake for 5 minutes, tossing in between to prevent burning. Let cool completely on the baking sheet.
  5. Place the remaining 2 cups of coconut into a food processor and process on high until the coconut begins to break down and forms a smooth, silky butter. You want the end product to be a "drippy" consistency, very pourable. This takes about 3-5 minutes and you might need to stop the food processor and scrape the sides of the bowl down as you go. Set the coconut butter aside in a jar.
  6. Place the 2 cups of cashews into the food processor and process on high until a smooth and creamy nut butter forms.
  7. Pour in a ½ c. of the coconut butter and process until everything is combined. The nut butter should be extremely creamy and smooth with a semi-drippy like consistency, but thick.
  8. Fold in the toasted coconut, and the remaining 1 c. of chopped cashews.
  9. Serve on toast or spread on anything else that comes to your imagination. 🙂

MANGIA!!!

Comments

  1. That’s so scary! I can’t even imagine. I’m glad you’re okay. Hopefully you can get your car fixed soon. This is why I’m so against texting and driving!

    On a positive note, this cashew-coconut butter looks amazing! I need to get a new food processor before I attempt this though.

    • Chelsy says:

      Thanks Emily! I wish I could fix my car…its totalled 🙁 Definitely get a new food processor…it’s totally worth it! 😉

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